I know its been a while since I have posted anything lifes been a little crazy since officially being a mother of two kids now. Its still so weird saying that like.."I have two kids" anyways Zayn will be three months on the fifth and honestly I am so blessed he is the most calm and happiest baby I have ever met and he is making this new baby experience so easy its like I'm a pro now seriously has been so fun and something different that I have talked about in my last blog is that with Zayn I am nursing and I love that hes so obsessed with me sounds so weird but hes all about mama and I am loving it my oldest was obsessed with his Dad so I'm pretty much grateful for this experience and so far so awesome!! I don't know if you remember me also talking about my other baby my crazy one my energetic loveable sour patch kid Dallas he is learning to love his brother everyday and to him I could only imagine how this experience has been for him I mean from his point of view he saw the baby as a stranger invading his house his parents and life, and to be honest its been hard for him and myself balancing making sure baby is well taken care of and making sure my big boy has all the attention in the world there were times when I was so emotional about it and I felt like a horrible mom because I felt I wasn't doing my job and maybe made him feel left out and that's not what I wanted the first month with Zayn was a little difficult because Dallas was getting angry starting to test us and getting really naughty around the house I felt over whelmed at one point I would just cry because I felt like he hated me there was one night where I put Dallas to bed and he told me he was mad at mommy and daddy and when I asked why he wouldn't answer me I mean I already knew why it was obvious because of the new baby but it kind of hurt my feelings in a way I know hes only three he doesn't really mean to hurt me but I don't want to break his heart. It came to a point where he was starting to drive me crazy it went from emotional to driving me crazy real quick I wasn't sure how to handle it but even now were still working on it with Dallas making sure he gets attention and getting him out the house so he doesn't get cabin fever of course. my family has been a big help over all to listening to me and helping out because its still hard to go places with both still getting used to it of course but having a conversation with my dad I was starting to get worried about my toddler because these temper tantrums were getting out of hand and I was afraid there was something more behind it but my dad helped relax me and assured me it was going to be ok and this was normal toddler behavior he suggested I take Dallas out more often to see different things and something we started was going to museums.
Dallas is obsessed with Dinasours and I have always wanted to take him to la brea tarpits which we ended up doing and he had an awesome time running in the grass being a boy and getting dirty which he enjoyed another museum we went too was the natural history museum which he also enjoyed as well but one of the difficulties I have with Dallas is being able to slow down and show him things I feel everything is fast pace and we have to keep moving I explained to my dad that this was one of the challenges I have currently takin him places and I started to compare he stopped me and told me not to compare because I'm going to stress myself out doing that which is true and he also told me Dallas is different in the best way of course that he is a high energetic child who just wants to be free and with him its going to take time to be able to be at a slower pace in public places which I did understand and have come to accept the fact that were going to have to take time and be able to get him to understand that to slow down a little he is three years old and I know his attention span is short most toddler do have short attention span at this age and hes still in the age where they are getting into things and causing trouble and this is ok its apart of the journey of motherhood that currently is hard for me but life isn't easy is it??
God didn't make life easy he put people and challenges in your life to teach and motivate you and maybe even push you in a different direction so I am still learning and going through this difficult phase and I know it will pass but til then my husband and I are on this journey together working with him. My goal this year is getting Dallas to different museums and taking him to places where he can learn and have fun at the same time because I know he enjoys that.
As far as being brother to Zayn of course we are still practicing soft touches and kisses and brother cant quite play cars yet but he appreciates big brother giving him cars to play with, he is starting to kiss his baby brother more often and say he loves him so slowly but surely he will develop that bond with him and be more gentle and hell maybe even start sharing...ok I'm getting ahead of myself now lol but eventually we will get there right now I'm also still learning to use the limo stroller aka the double stroller that thing is massive! and so annoying let me tell you id rather Dallas walk my mom got a double stroller for the kids and its so huge and she loves that thing me on the other hand still learning not to bump into people with it haha aside from that me and Jonathan for the past three days have been waking up to kids in our bed ..which is another thing we are working on he was doing so good until a week ago I personally blame it on the cold weather?..Idk? lets see where things go I'm making it a goal to get things back where they were and behaviors more aligned I feel like March has something different for me and my family the year is still young and we have an adventure ahead of us with Zayn growing and Dallas getting older and becoming more of a big boy this has been one heck of a crazy few months but I am learning still and will never give up.
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